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Rick Burnett: Let's continue our discussion about detoxifying stress by discussing the Holmes-Rahe scale of stress.  Dr. DiSiena, will you explain the scale of stress to us?

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:  There are a certain amount of stresses that occur in our life.   Researchers have placed a numeric value on each of these stresses.  It's interesting that the death of a spouse has a numeric value of 100.  The researchers have determined that 80% of people have a total value of stress greater than 300 and they have a greater incidence of life-threatening illnesses.  So, it's a good indicator of where we will be if we less stress accumulate in our life.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:  Some of the biggest numbers would include moving.  For example here's a scenario of someone who is going to be stressed to the "max" - which happens on a regular basis.  The wife says she wants a separation; so they begin divorce proceedings.  At the same time, he finds a new job in a new state or community.  So, suddenly there are three major things taking place, a move, a new job, and a divorce - all creating incredible stress.  If you're in a situation like that, there can be some very negative side effects.

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:  And, just not negative stress.  For instance, someone who is getting married has more stress that someone who is fired from their job. 

Dr. Robert A. Schuller: Well, in that case it's a major life change.  If you get fired, you just go out and get a new job.  Marriage is life changing!

Rick Burnett:  Just to give people an idea of some stresses that are illustrated in the book.  A death of a spouse is 100 points.  73 points for a divorce.  65 points for marital separation.  63 points for a jail term.  63 points for the death of a close family member.  When you total up the points based on which item(s) effect you, then you have an idea of your stress score.  Then you'll have an idea of what you need to work on.

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:   Well, sometimes, it just is what it is.  Sometimes you can't do anything to prevent the stress - for instance, a move or a new job, or a stress of a positive change in your financial status. People who read this book will not fall into the 80%.  We don't want to give people the wrong impression that if they go through some of these stress, illness will be the natural outcome.  All it means is they need to practice Possibility Living so that the don't fall into the 80% category.

Rick Burnett: The book, Possibility Living, is about solutions.  Let's talk about some of the solutions for reducing stress.  One is that you say we need to become "God-centered" instead of "crisis-centered."

Dr. Robert A. Schuller: Becoming God-centered is something that will clearly help us shift the stress from negatively projecting the future to giving us the ability to project into the reality of God.  What happens is we stop thinking of all the things that can harm us by this future projecting and start thinking about all the ways that God is blessing us, and that will dramatically lower our stress levels. 

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:  I agree 100%.  When we step away from becoming God-centered, we become self-centered.  Many of us have been in a room with a toxic person who has one tragedy issue after another.  One of the things they can do is to get off of themselves and start serving the Lord by serving other people.  Once we become God-centered and follow the will of the Lord, I think a lot of the stressful issues we have become displaced by the Father's power of the Holy Spirit. 

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:  Recently, I preached a sermon on "I am the Vine, you are the branches."  That's what Doug is saying.  We need to remain in Jesus Christ.  In that scripture passage, He tells us:  "remain in me and I will remain in you; you can ask the Father whatever you want and I will give it to you."  The best way to understand how that works is to look at the story; or the historical accounts of Lawrence of Arabia after the First World War.  After that war he brought some of the Arabs to Versailles in Paris for the peace conference.  It was the first time some of the Arabs had been in Europe and they just marveled at the architecture of Paris and the beauty of the city.  But, the thing they marveled at more than anything else was these magical water producers they had in their rooms.  All they had to do was to turn a knob and water appeared out of the faucets.  After the peace conference the manager of the hotel came to the peace conference and said to Lawrence, you have to do something - the Arabs are tearing apart the plumbing - they were taking the faucets with them!  Lawrence of Arabia had to explain to them that they were just taking the faucets that the water came from a totally different source.  He explained that if you separate the faucet from its source, the faucet has zero value.  Likewise with us with are the branches that produces fruit from the vine; Jesus is the vine, God is the gardener.  So, we pray to God and ask for whatever we need to produce the fruit He wants us to produce.  God will provide the fertilizer and water the fields, and Jesus being the vine sends His roots down into the soil, and like the well where the water is pumped from into the faucet; we are like a faucet and produce the water that comes from the source that God provides.  So, if we get disconnected from our source, God - it is very difficult for us to do anything. Looking to ourselves for success, we are limited to our own capacities.  It's like taking the faucet out of a box and saying OK, give me some water.  It doesn't have anything to give.  On the other hand, if you hook it up to the plumbing, which is hooked up to the main reservoir, there is an endless supply of water.

Rick Burnett:   Another important step you mention is to "focus your mind on the positive."  You use Philippians 4:4-8 to help this focus; why this verse?

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:   I love that scripture verse - it is a formula for peace.  We live in an anxious world.  If we really took those verses to heart we would understand the peace that comes from God.  Let me read a couple of verses:  "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God, and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."  We can have this type of peace in our life if we choose to through the Holy Spirit.

Rick Burnett:   One of the other steps you talk about to reduce stress is to turn your stress into strength with optimism.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:   If we are stressing out about the future, we have to be optimistic about future.  We find that optimism by looking to God, looking at the promises He has for us - realizing that He will give us whatever we need to succeed and then living in the present, making sure we have what is required to become the fruitful people God calls us to be. 

Rick Burnett:   Another way you say to reduce stress is to keep praying, rather than keep fighting against the stress.

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:   Yes that's what we mean by staying connected.  Prayer is the way we stay connected to the source.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:   The bible says ask whatever you wish and it will be given to you - I can't tell you how many times Jesus has told us to "ask and it will be given to you, seek and you will find, knock and the doors will be open to you."  That is in the gospel of Matthew.  In John he says to "ask the father whatever you wish and it will be given to you."  Throughout the entire bible you see this ask and you will receive concept.  I just immediately assume that asking is prayer.  Part of prayer in my life is my mental thinking.  For me, prayer doesn't mean getting down on my knees and folding my hands and closing my eyes.  I prayer with my thoughts - "God, help me through this" - "God, I'm going to need this or that..".  For me, that is in many ways almost of a more sincere prayer than to get on my knees.

Rick Burnett:    It's that ongoing relationship with God that we've been talking about.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:  That is woven throughout this whole book - you'll see that thread through every chapter of this book.  It is absolutely fundamental.

Rick Burnett:   Another step to reducing stress is the importance of keeping a journal.  Why is that important and how can keeping a journal help to reduce stress?

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:  They have actually done studies on people who keep journals.  It's another way of getting connected to your emotions.  Some people have a more difficult time with that than others.  If you're having a difficult time connecting to your emotions, we know that one of the ways to do that is by journaling.  Also, once you begin to journal - you can look back and say, "oh, that wasn't so bad - I've been through it."  It helps us to put our life in perspective and meet the challenges of our life.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:    The only time I journal is when I'm feeling really stressed.  I agree with Doug that it really helps.  Do you journal all the time Doug, or just when you're going through challenging times?

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:    I used to only journal when I was going through tough times.  However, it's interesting I met a person who told me that you should also journal when things are going well.  In fact in my new computer program there is a journaling mechanism, so that you can journal on a day to day basis.  It's private and nobody can see it, so I've been using that to journal both the challenging times and the positive times.

Rick Burnett:  Another step you say is important is to laugh a lot.   You refer to Norman Cousins - tell us about him.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:   Well, Norman Cousins started watching comedy movies - you see, he was told to go home and die with cancer.  So, he went out and bought comedy movies and watched them all day long and he laughed and laughed.  As a result, he came out with his books and the thought process of psychoneuroimmunology.  If we laugh it does have healing properties.  Our minds, in the process of laughing and having fun and enjoying life, puts out positive neuro-chemicals which go through and heal the body.  It speeds up the healing process.  If you think positive thoughts - it's not just a Pollyanna theory - there is scientific proof that you will be healthier.

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:   You know the Bible says "the heart at peace gives life to the body."  So, that makes you wonder about a heart that is not at peace, what would happen to the body?  This follows along with what Norman Cousins did.  He laughed - he enjoyed the moment - he lived the moment.  It's hard to be laughing and be concerned about some future event all at the same time.  If you're laughing, you're in the moment.  You can either block this wonderful healing energy that God has given us, or we can allow the healing energy to flow.  When the healing energy flows, our body will be healed and renewed and we will have a bright, positive future..  When we block that energy, the body will go towards sickness and disease.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:  If you ever get a diagnosis from a Doctor who tells you that you're dying from something.  You need to laugh and say to him, "I'm not dying of cancer - I'm living with cancer."  That will do two things.  By laughing it will put it in its proper perspective.  It's cancer.  It's not killing you.  You are just living with it.  If you realize that you're living with it and not dying from it, you're body will start repairing itself.  Even if you do die prematurely, you will have lived longer and happier as a result of making that decision. 

Rick Burnett:  In the book you also use an acronym - ACE, Attend, Connect, Express.

Dr. Douglas DiSiena:   We first need to attend and face the situation - not run from it. The first step towards healing a situation is to confront/attend to a situation.  This ACE method is really the 12-step process condensed into 3 steps.  So, first you need to attend to the situation and your feelings.  The next step is to connect with your feelings.  That's part of what journaling is all about.  Maybe a person would need to see a Christian counselor or a Pastor to help them connect with their feelings.  Many people have a disconnection with what they're feeling and the situation.  The last thing is you need to express those feelings appropriately.  That may mean you need to cry, or you may need to laugh.  You may need to rejoice or you may need to grieve for a time.  Feelings are appropriate and we need to be able to express them.

Dr. Robert A. Schuller:   I would add the following, which I liken to the first few steps of the 12 steps which says:  I Can't; He Can; Let Him.  That sums it up for me!